Updated: Mar 8
In a Facebook group, I am a member of, run by my friend Leila Hardy, there was a discussion about what is blocking you from success and it went into childhood conditioning and how words can make or break a child and create blockages in later life, stopping you from creating success in all areas of your life.
This made me remember a movie, “Sister Act 2” with Whoopi Goldberg and Lauren Hill, where a boy in a high school music class says:
Chaka Zulu said words carry power!
Chaka Zulu was a Southern African King whose battle cry was so terrifying that it scared his enemies to the core. But words can also have great powers in a positive sense. They can support a person in being self-empowered to create without fear the life he or she wants to live.
I was taking part in a 30-day blogging challenge and I decided to write about the POWER OF WORDS in all its aspects, as what links all my manifold books and services, is exactly that: WORDS.
To start out with, I wrote a two-piece blog on how our social conditioning in childhood influences us into adulthood and how our life choices are coloured by this, including how we act as parents.
So why do parents – and most parents love their children and want their best – so often hamper their children’s progress by being naysayers?
The answer is that they are acting from their own fears. They want to shield their children from harm, from disappointments, from falling flat on their faces, hitting rock bottom and having their dreams shattered. They know how that feels because they had to bury so many dreams through their own conditioning, not being aware that these blockages born from fear created the failures in the first place. Or they know that painter who never made it big and still struggles at the financial minimum existence level, or they think you have to be a genius to make it to the top of the ladder in a field where the path to the summit is strewn with broken bones of people who never made it, fell off that ladder and crashed, hitting rock bottom.
They see the fear perspective, the failures, not the creator’s path, that made it.
It takes a thief to know a thief.
This proverb is not meant literally. It means that you identify with and focus on that which is congruent with your own life experience, your own perspective of life, whether this is fear-based or freedom-based.
So what do you tell your children?
I don’t want you to get hurt.
Learn a proper profession first, so you have something to fall back on, if it doesn’t work out.
It’s only a handful of people who have ever made it and now times have changed and it is even harder.
Don’t be disappointed, try something else, you can always keep it as a hobby.
Life isn’t a ponyfarm, it’s hard work.
I believe in you.
How can I help you?
Don’t worry, next time, you’ll make it.
Failures and mistakes are there to learn from, now you know how not to do it.
That was a great effort, get up and try again.
I think you’re brilliant, talented and I admire your tenacity.
Don’t give up, you’ll make it!
I’ve got your six!
Spot the difference? And as a parent, this has not always been easy, I admit. It comes easier when your child wants to do something you like. But when your son wants to work in a butcher’s shop outside of school hours and you’re a vegetarian, it’s a challenge. Yes, I’m talking about myself here. I had to go inside me and tell myself that it doesn’t mean, my son is “betraying” all the principles and ideals I have tried to instil in him. My fear-based part of the brain told me, he is rejecting ME. I was afraid at first, I might lose him altogether.
Read Part 2 here, where you can find out how the power of words influenced me to better support my son’s dream in making it a reality!